Beanies: A Rhetorical Essay

Beanies; the quintessential winter accessory, no? No. I propose to you that the beanie transcends seasons. It outlasts the seasonal sales of silly department stores, becoming an everlasting epitome of that which is chic. This transformative quality carries over to he or she who wears the beanie, propelling them to a higher social status most commonly known as "hipster." Yet there is something intrinsic about this headgear that defies the petty constraints of stereotypes.

"I'm sorry, you don't like hipster girls?"

Okay, so maybe it's still a hat..


But it's a cooling looking hat, okay? And yes, maybe people will look at you strange if you wear it outside during the summer in Florida (not speaking from personal experience, or anything) but at least you'll be hipster! Maybe you'll even score some points with the hipster girl in the above picture. Just saying. Yes, guys can wear beanies for the sake of fashion too.

Beanies are excellent for accentuating facial hair.

So what's the deal with these magical mats of wool (or cotton)? Perhaps it is the versatility with which one can don them. For as many different styles and colors beanies come in, there are just as many ways for both guys and girls to wear them. From the trendy pulled-over look to the hipster hanging-off-the-back-of-my-head look, there is a style for everyone to adopt (and perhaps disown).

Note: I am not responsible for any injuries resulting from the usage of beanies.

So here's to the beanie. Here's to being the independent, non-conformist type that doesn't mind having ridiculous beanie hair by the end of the day, because being awesome is way more important. And obviously, if you're wearing a beanie, you must be awesome. At least, you are when you're wearing that beanie. So please, (pretty please) don't take it off. In the meantime, I hope you enjoy this blog about beanie hats for men, beanies for girls and even kids beanies. Because at the end of the day, we all could use a beanie or two! (or if you're me, six)